A scribbling in my journal while in Mexico on December 31:
'Here I am, angry. Why? Because I'm not surfing. Why? Because my arms no longer work. The waves are so incredibly good, and there is barely anyone surfing, but I can no longer do it. It's too painful. My back, arms, legs. Spent! I'm happy and angry simultaneously.'
Back to real time:
It's now Sunday, January 8, the last day of my month-long visit home and once again I'm happy and angry at the same time. Why? Let me briefly run through what I've been up to over the past month and you tell me how you'd feel.
The first two weeks here were filled with touch-base encounters with family and friends. There were so many people I wanted to see in such limited time, and I was able to chat with most of them but not all, and even those I did see I rarely got past 'How's Africa been? It's been like this, and how've you been? Cool. See you in a year.' Nevertheless, those brief reconnections were much better than nothing, not to mention the fact that they were often held over large and delicious meals.
After Christmas is when I scrambled down to Mexico for five days with four friends. And there I finally got a big stretch of time with some big old friends, which was very comforting. We were able to get beyond small talk and that was very gratifying. Oh yeah, let's not forget about the fantastic right sand point that we surfed ourselves out on too. We even headed out to Joshua Tree to rock climb before I returned to Mom's house.
A scribbling from my journal after all that:
'My body hurts. Cut on left heel and top of right foot. Sore quads, back, and shoulders from surfing. Sore forearms and scratched up hands from climbing hand cracks. I'm so happy. I see now that without some sort of injury I don't feel alive.'
With that tenderizing of my body came a softening of spirit, as I returned able to speak about Lesotho more easily when meeting up with a few more friends and relatives over the last week.
I'm now relaxed, feeling at home in America, no longer awkward as at first, and my flight leaves for Lesotho at midnight. How should I feel?